Sadness for my Black CHILDREN/Men!!!

Now, some may know that I don’t like to get too personal on here or anywhere in ‘the wide web’ but Today, I Must share.. I woke up to the news of Mr. Alton Sterling’s murder and it set the coarse for the rest of my day.. maybe the rest of my week, definitely a continuation of the rest of my life!!!.. You see; I’ve NEVER understood why my black brothers more than anyone else, Must be MURDERED by the people who are in place to PROTECT us!!!!! WHY must I as a MOTHER of BLACK Gentlemen, who are Still CHILDREN/Teens tell my BLACK sons today… “I KNOW you guys want to play with your toy ‘bright green and orange water guns, BUTTTTTTTT!!!!” (because it’s nearly 95 degrees outside today)… “IF, a cop rolls up while y’all are playing, what should y’all do?” (They’ve had these water squirters or years. I WOULDN’T Purchase them today, yesterday, or even Two years ago!) Being the usual CHILDREN/Teens that they are, they had the WRONG answer!!!! You see, THIS.. is what these murderous cops seem to forget; we’re dealing with CHILDREN who’ve NEVER been in this life before!!! They have NO CLUE of what ‘the world’ expects of them, they just go off of what they see to be right!… My CHILDREN said they would continue to play with their ‘bright green & orange water guns’ IF a cop approached as IF Nothing was WRONG, one even said he would ‘throw’ his water gun IF approached by a cop!!!.. I told them they BOTH were WRONG!!!! “You see, my sweet, INNOCENT, darling babies, it doesn’t matter how INNOCENT your play is; you are seen as a BLACK MAN in America!” “IF a cop approached you, no matter how INNOCENT your actions are, you need to STOP what you are doing!!!!!!!!!!! Drop your bright green & orange toy or whatever is in your hand!!!” “DON’T throw it because you’ll come across as an AGGRESSIVE BLACK MAN! DON’T ignore the cops and keep INNOCENTLY playing… EVERY MOVE YOU MAKE IN THEIR PRESENCE COULD COST YOU YOUR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (No matter how INNOCENT the move may seem in your mind, ‘Tamir Rice’) Even if you’re reaching for your wallet to show I.D. You need to verbally say it FIRST!!!!!!!”
Surprisingly (complete sarcasm!) my sons didn’t even want to go outside, didn’t want to leave the safety of their home, not even to go the back yard; after our talk!!! But I convinced them to go outside, be kids, have fun; but just remember what I’ve said.. They went, they played, they laughed, they enjoyed each other’s company as they sprayed each other with water on this hot day… As I watched and giggled at their INNOCENT childhood exchange of summer fun; both tears of happiness and sadness filled my eyes!!!! I though of how sad it was that they were reduced to playing only in the confines of the more secluded back yard because we were all afraid of what may happen if a cop rolled by, on the street of the, more visible front yard, I thought “wow, look at their laughter as they cool off with the squirted water, look at my babies that I carried in my womb that have grown up to be such sweet young men, I could feel them moving inside of my body, we SHARED a body at one point and instead of COMPLETELY Celebrating their growth and matureness, I have to ‘tell them the limits of how they’re allowed TO PLAY as a BLACK CHILD/MAN!!!!!!’

😦

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